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The iPhone Shuffle is here March 8, 2007

Posted by sk in Apple, iPhone, Microsoft, Technology and Software, Vatican.
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iPShortly after wowing the world with the iPhone, Steve Jobs today announced that Apple is already working on a “Shuffle” version of the iPhone. “Like the iPod Shuffle, the iPhone Shuffle comes without a screen,” Jobs announced to a roomful of Apple fans and tech journalists. After a brief standing ovation, Jobs continued, “The phone will also have no buttons and will be entirely voice activated. It also has a unique shuffle feature that arbitrarily picks a number to call from a list of numbers preloaded by the user into the desktop software for Windows and OS X.” Jobs claimed that the “Shuffle” feature is new to cell phones and will change the way people talk. “Our competitor thought the Zune would be a social device but this is magnificent. This is the true social device.” It has also been reported by sources at Saturday Night Live that the phone will have an iGenie that grants three iWishes.

Details about how much the phone will cost are sketchy but sources indicate that the phone will be available with a 2 GB Nand memory and will retail for $59.99 with a two year contract with AT&T.

Analysts hailed Jobs’ announcement and Apple’s share prices rose to an all-time high of $1000 when trading closed on Wednesday, March 7th, 2007.

Close on the heels of Jobs’ announcement a spokesperson for Microsoft claimed that Microsoft was working on a similar product called “Microsoft Windows Live Phone Shuffle edition” which they plan to release in 2010.

In other news, an anonymous commentor on a Windows site has indicated that the Pope has agreed to initiate proceedings for the canonization of Steve Jobs. Steve Jobs, as many of you already know, is already known as a “living saint” in many circles.

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